The music that can be heard on this page is Maria Elena by Ken Colyer's Jazzmen in Audimax, Hamburg, Germany on 13th October, 1967. Ken Colyer, trumpet; Tony Pyke, clarinet; Geoff Cole, trombone; Johnny Bastable, banjo; Bill Cole, bass; Malc Murphy, drums. Taken from Summer CD 9216 Ken Colyer's Jazzmen "Live 1967".

When you've been in this game as long as I have by Tony Pyke

Previously published in the Ken Colyer Trust Newsletter of June 1993

To some people Ken must have seemed abrupt if not quite rude at times. He didn't find conversation easy, particularly with strangers, and had no time for small talk. He was usually alright on matters close to his heart such as music, the sea and later garden-ing, but basically he was extremely shy and an introvert. He did, however, have a wicked sense of humour and among his favourite funny people were W.C. Fields, Sgt. Bilko and Mr Magoo. He disliked the Goons, especially Harry Secombe's laugh. On more than one occasion after sessions at The Thames Hotel, Hampton Court, Ken would come back to my house to catch an episode of Sgt. Bilko and several glasses of my home made beer. Although he had switched over to drinking gin at this time he would jump at the opportunity to come back to sample my home brew.

I recall, with affection, the way Ken mispronounced words and would sometimes cause unease, not that I am suggesting he was right and the rest of the world was wrong or vice versa. Probably the most popular examples were a-kows-tik (acoustic), brok-a-lie (broccoli), A-gar-tha (Agatha Christie), jer-illa (guerilla warfare), toe-pee (toupee), bro-kure (holiday brochure). There was an occasion when I was driving up to the 100 Club coping with heavy rush hour traffic at Knightsbridge. I was fairly adjacent to Harrods when Ken leant across to remark about the weather we had experienced the night before. He said 'Wasn't that torriential (tor-rential) rain we had last night'. I acknowledged but couldn't help smiling. Then he said 'My trows couldn't cope'. I said I didn't understand what he was saying, to which he said 'My trows you know, my trows couldn't cope with the torriential rain'. I still couldn't grasp what he was trying to say. He tried again 'My trows man, my trows round the top of the house couldn't cope with the torriential rain, don't you understand English'. After some deliberation I realised he meant his troughs (troffs) so I said 'you mean your guttering'. He concluded 'Trows, troffs, troffs, trows, what does it matter'.

We were on stage in Amman, Jordan midway through a hot sweaty session when a rather refined young English lady requested a number. I would guess she worked at the Embassy. She went on to ask Ken if he was enjoying being in that part of the world and particularly in Jordan. He scowled at her and said 'As long as I have a roll-up in one hand, a gin and tonic in the other and a band that swings behind me I couldn't give a damn where I am'. As I said earlier, not the world's greatest conversationalist!

It is worth recalling, some years earlier, just how keen the Rosenbergs were on following the band around. They were absolutely fanatical and if anyone in the band were to make a derogatory remark about them Ken would jump down their throats, reminding us all that if we had four or five hundred Les and Maeve Rosenbergs, all our troubles would be over. They lived in Cheltenham but later moved to Pinner to be nearer to home base. I remember we were playing in Newcastle-upon-Tyne and they turned up with just about twenty minutes of the session to go. They apologised for being late due to road works and heavy traffic. They were very generous and most nights would meet up at the band wagon after the gig before we headed for home and out would come the leather bound case containing one large hip flask and six silver plated mini goblets. As they approached, Ken Ames would nudge me and say 'Here comes Capt. Morgan with the breathaliser top ups'. When we arrived back at 99, The Drive, we would all head off in different directions but Ken would invariably climb into the Rosenbergs car for further top ups before eventually going in for his rabbit stew. Rumour had it that Maeve kept a picture of Ken in a pendant around her neck.

We used to swap things from our gardens. He would admire the show of snowdrops I had every January/February so I gave him a clump to put into his garden. I raved about the horseradish relish he made so he gave me a clump of horseradish to put into my garden. I would strongly advise all roast beef eaters to use this accompaniment.

Recipe: Take the root of the horseradish plant, clean thoroughly, shred in the food blender, mix to the right consistency with distilled vinegar and fresh single cream. Store in small jars and refrigerate. I make a year's supply around October.

I think one of my favourite stories is when Ken was coming out of a 'gents' hotly pursued by someone who pointed out to him that he had not washed his hands. He replied 'When you've been in this game as long as I have you learn not to piss on your fingers'.

Tony Pyke

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